So it's been about a week since Master left. In the past, when I have had to deal with extended absences like this, the first week has always been the most difficult to deal with. It's funny; even though Master is in charge, there are a lot of things that he deals with around the house and suddenly dealing with everything is not so easy.
I'm used to feeling like Master is nearby. It gives me a lot of security and right now, that security is non existent. I still keep in touch with him really well via text but there are things that I worry could happen and if they do, I'm kind of screwed. My back going out is one of the main things that I worry about. I had a severe flare-up when I hurt my back at work about a year ago and couldn't get up and down the stairs. I have no idea what I would do if that happened while Master is away.
We've had a snowfall, though, and I found a way to clear the driveway that didn't a)involve me trying to get the flat tire back on the snowblower or b)screwing my back up so that I couldn't work afterwards. So that's something I feel a little more confident about. It's not much but its something.
The problem is that since Master has gone away, "people-ing" has felt a lot more difficult than it normally does. I'm not the most social of people at the best of times. I get irritated pretty easily and there comes a point in the day when I just don't want to talk to ANYONE anymore if I can avoid it. At that point, the only people I want around me are Master and my kidlets. Since Master isn't here, I find that my tolerance for random human interaction is less than it is.
That wouldn't be so bad except that I work in retail. My entire JOB involves interacting with people. When I feel angry or snappish, it shows. I really don't want to take it out on my coworkers or the customers. Hopefully my human-avoidance levels improve over time.
Who knows how long that will take.
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